Why is everyone so much more important nowadays? If you you don't own a blog do you exist at all?

I blog, therefore I am: Its a new world order.

Frankly I do concede it to be incredibly post-modern (well actually whatever contemporary culture deems is the post, post- modern) to raise this debate in a blog. But, here I go I guess.

Look at that last sentence for a minute will you? See how I started it with 'but?' What a revolutionary concept...no really. My wonderful English teacher Mrs.Robinson (yes that was her name and yes my mate Morry  and I sat in the back row and hummed dudt-ta, dudt, ta-dudt, dud dud, dud dud do,  all day long) would always stress the rules of grammar were quite specific about not beginning sentences with 'but' or 'and.'

Quite right for mine too. It always sounds like you are picking up the story midstream. 'Now...where was I? That's right- But....'

Much later I enrolled in a creative writing course and had another brilliant teacher by the name of Ray Mooney, who's bugbear (and trust me all writers and most readers have lots of them) was...well using the word 'was.' He taught us to edit a piece by finding words like 'has', 'had', 'was', 'that' and excising them.

He's spot on. They are a form of weasel word and don't serve a purpose other than to  slow your prose's momentum.

Why am I rambling on about this? What does it have to do with blogging....well everything. Grammar is so old skool these days that people really spell school with a 'k' for irony and kitsch aesthetic. Numerals are now shortcuts. 'Great' apparently features a number 8. Phrases are strings of letters, LMAO, LOL and my favorite: BTW. That I get, because it is such a nothing phrase, shorthand in of itself to segue  into a change in topic.

That's my point. There is a new world order. The belief in the Warholian ideal of our fifteen minutes of fame. The cliche that everyone can be famous, morphed in the globalised world of the superhighway into the premise that everyone has the RIGHT to be a celebrity.

A celebrity?

Really? Let us just stop right there for a minute and think upon that. What has celebrity got to do with famous? My closest  guess  is that famous became something it never used to be. Famous became the ability to walk a red carpet and get papped. 

Ricky Gevais, who admits he might have a phobia of fame, points out that the dreams of small children have a reached a level of preposterous hero worship, which finds them dreaming of being famous-

That's it.

 When asked what they want to be  when they grow up, they are just as inclined to reply- 'I want to be famous,' than say, be an an astronaut.

Now I wanted to be a garbo when I grew up but that might say more about my lack of ambition. Certainly, I quite fancied being the good Doctor (as in Dr.Who. I'm such a massive geek about this that I will point out he is always referred to as The Doctor and never Dr.Who.)

I could see myself as Han Solo, sure but they are not real and I knew that. I imagined I piloted the TARDIS or the Falcon sure. I never once thought I could BE them though. They were two things I could  never hope to be- fictional and alien. ( just to keep the tinfoil hat conspiracy theorists happy!)

So why, now, do kids want to be famous people? Gervais also points out that these children must look at George Clooney on the red carpet, dressed up to the nines and smiling; waving and being photographed and simply think- I want that to be my life. Never once realizing that what they are witnessing is an actor at work.

Clooney is properly famous you see. He studied acting. Worked anonymously for decades, auditioning and failing, getting small inconsequential parts.

He acted... like an actor does, and he honed his craft.  

Then he got his first huge break as a fully formed mature actor on a medical drama and rode that success into a career, that has made him the darling of red carpets. He is famous for a body of work. He is a celebrity because the paparazzi want a scoop; not because he wants the tabloids to notice him. 

Years ago I remember hearing Tim Roth, fresh from his star turn in Reservoir Dogs,  state in an interview something along the lines of - I worked for so long to be a famous actor. Who am I to now turn around and complain about the attention? I wanted this, so it's my own f***ing fault that I got it!

That's proper famous. Dealing with the attention that you day job visits upon you. Now, in a world that, frankly Andy Warhol would have dug hard, everyone thinks that to be famous is appearing on reality TV, if your dreams are even that large.

Starting a blog will do, maybe someone else famous will read it and you're suddenly a star on the rise? Perhaps you can post on YouTube? Look how many hits you got? Gees, you've gone viral!

The borders are open man, it's a new frontier out there and you have to make a grab for that land- Stake your claim and get famous.

Michael Sheen’s* father is a Jack Nicholson look-a-like. Not an impersonator, he doesn't do that distinctive voice.  He simply looks like Jack and is employed to turn up at yours and do that.

What a perfect analogy for celebrity- culture -Just fake it and you'll make it. Meanwhile, Mr. Sheen's son is a master of inhabiting famous people's personas and convincing you he is indeed them.

That, for mine, is famous and celebrity defined.

So back to the blog good people!

Why am I here and what do I want to say? Should I have a manifesto? Surely I should. Why else would I want to write a blog for?

Don't I want to be famous? Well......no actually.

I write because as the great Paul Weller once so eloquently put it when asked if he would ever stop performing- No, it's a part of me that's more instinct than anything. I play music because it's who I am. 

He then went on to answer the question I'd often posed but never thought clearly enough about- What would The Rolling Stones do if they weren't The Rolling Stones?

You see it so clearly sometimes. Suddenly the Stones weren't cashing in after all. They just didn't know what else to do. That's what passion is. Knowing you have to do it because what else is there?

Welcome to my passion.

*Who is great actor, if you don't know his name Google** him and I guarantee you do.
** We'll get to talking about Google one day I am sure.

image source:
http://www.iwannabefamous.com/featured/austin-lee-tilley-is-famous/